Sunday, October 22, 2006

Too Big For My Stitches

Remember yesterday's Sirdar Highlander DAD'S EASY CABLES from SOCKS SOCKS SOCKS?

Goodbye, Blog.

Hello, Frog Pond.

Yes, they are no more. (Isn't that something like Yes, We Have No Bananas?) (Did you know Merv Griffin made I've Got A Lovely Bunch of Coconuts famous?) (Have you ever even heard of I've Got A Lovely Bunch of Coconuts?) (I am the repository of all things unimportant, inconsequential, and irrelevant.) I finished the cuff and leg then decided to ask Goldisox to try them on before I started the heel flap. The damn things were starting to remind me more of chain mail than knitted wool and I figured for once in my misbegotten life to err on the side of caution.

He couldn't yank the blasted things over his (admittedly high) instep. So I decided to give it a try. Imagine my surprise when I couldn't do it either. Okay, cabling tightens up your gauge. That's a given. I knew that. A little light started flickering in the dark recesses of my mind. Hmm. Could that be why they wanted me to knit the cabled part with a needle THREE SIZES larger than the one used for cuff and foot? Is it possible they knew what they were doing and I SHOULD HAVE LISTENED TO THEM?

I feel like a schmuck. A total dingbat-headed moron. I know how cables operate. I read the instructions. I know they specified multiple needle sizes for different parts of the process.

But Ms I-Don't-Need-a-Pattern chose to ignore the advice and ended up knitting a sock leg that could be used in hospitals to provide lower leg compression for bedridden patients.

Remember I said there was a lesson to be learned somewhere?

Guess I just found out what it was!


Blogger kshotz said...

Man! I hate it when that sort of thing happens! I just frogged a sock I had started 3 times. I've decided I simply hate the yarn. I've given myself permission to stash it and pull out some Lana Grossa MegaBoot Stretch I got on vacation in Michigan. I've been dying to try I am!

In the meantime I did a quick knit pair of slipper socks out of worsted Red Heart acrylic (*yuck!*) on US #6 needles for a Christmas slipper gift. My dtr. was trying out for All-State band so I had a day to kill.

Well, better scoot. I'll try to post pics of the slippers tomorrow!


9:34 PM  
Blogger Barbara Bretton said...

Kim, I climbed back on the horse that threw me and cast on the same yarn for some plain old cuff-down stockinettes on #5US Addis. No more chain mail socks for this knitter! Good luck with your Lana Grossa MegaBoot Stretch. That's on my ever-growing list of Gotta Knits.

9:56 PM  
Blogger Cindi Myers said...

I can so relate Barb. I do this sort of thing all the time.

10:35 PM  
Blogger Barbara Bretton said...

Thanks, Cindi. I'm glad to know I'm not alone!

11:25 PM  
Blogger Dallas Schulze said...

I can actually sing most of I've Got a Lovely Bunch of Coconuts. Those who love useless information tend to flock together?

Yes, sometimes pattern writers actually know what they're talking about although they're wrong just often enough to tempt the more stubborn among us to ignore the parts we don't like. Don't you hate those moments when you realize there was a reason behind that part of the instructions you ignored?

5:32 PM  
Blogger Barbara Bretton said...

Dallas, isn't it weird the things that stick in your mind? I can sing Coconuts, Yes We Have No Bananas, and (hold tight now!) Jeremiah Peabody's Poly-Unsaturated Quick-Dissolving Fast-Acting Pleasant-Tasting Green and Purple Pills. I do One-Eyed One-Horned Flying Purple People Eater as an encore.

It's no wonder we're friends!

11:32 PM  

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