Friday, March 27, 2009

The Mystery of the Missing Socks


I can't even blame the washer or dryer because neither of the two missing socks has a completed mate yet.

And at the rate this is going, they never will.

I've been on a sock binge this year. One freaking sock after another. If I'm not at the laptop I'm curled up on the sofa knitting socks like my life depended on it. Cozy, comfy socks but butt ugly. Definitely nothing camera-worthy. Mostly they've been my plain old cuff-down, heel flap, gusset knit-'em-in-your-sleep method that doesn't require any intervention from my brain. (Which is a good thing since my brain has been taken over by work and has nothing left to give.) (Did I tell you I tried to microwave a container of soy milk?) (Do you know how hard it is to wedge a quart of soy milk into a microwave?)(Will I ever run out of ( )?)

Here's a partial list of sock progress:

  • Plain white cuff down for Goldisox in Berroco Comfort - worsted
  • Plain white toe up for me (love love love Judy's Magic Cast-on)
  • Plain heather blue cuff down for Goldisox in Lion Brand Wool-Ease (an aside: of all the different yarns I've tried, he loves Wool-Ease the best. Go figure.)
  • Spiral cuff down for Goldisox in Lion Brand Wool-Ease - oatmeal
  • Spiral cuff down for me in leftovers from above
  • Cuff down for me in something bright and colorful for which I no longer possess labels (smart, huh?) (unfinished)
  • 1 Best Foot Forward in Cash Soft DK
  • 1 cuff down, 7-1 ribbing, in Crazy Colors Stretch (muted manly brown tones)
See the last two? They're my problem children. The Best Foot Forward was going to be for me (hence the pink) and I was very excited about them. I love the pattern, love the yarn, love the color. I don't love the fact that the finished sock, the pattern, the yarn, and the needles have disappeared from the face of my universe. I swear I turned around and poof! They were gone.

And that other one, the manly brown stretchy sock--well, you won't see me posting its ugly face on a milk carton any time soon. I was about to start the toe when it went missing and made the mistake of trying on the stupid small-needled time-waster and gasped in horror and what I saw. I mean, if it looked so stretched out, holey, and horrible on my foot what in the name of Elizabeth Zimmermann is it going to look like on Goldisox's size 11+? It looked so gorgeous on the needles. The ribbing provided just enough textural interest to bump up all of that understated neutrality. I haven't a clue why 7 knits and 1 purl stretches to a wildly unattractive degree while 5 knits and 1 purl behaves itself.

If you have any ideas, please leave them in comments because if I ever find that sock I just might turn it into a parrot toy.

And, trust me, that is a sad end for a sock.

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11 Comments:

Blogger kozmic said...

Though we may we love them dearly, euthanasia
is the only kind way to deal with such problem socks. It seems cruel but believe me - they will drain all the happy sock knitting love right out of you.Once a year I hand such 'oucasts' to my youngest daughter and she happily frogs them. I get more wool to play with and she gets the sadistic pleasure of tearing apart hours of hard work.

3:20 PM  
Blogger Sara said...

Well, I Like the pink sock - I hate that you may have lost its mate forever...

The other is just as good gone if you hated it...

Socks are strange creatures!!! But, I still love to knit them.

7:14 PM  
Blogger JellyDonut said...

I'm looking for the perfect sock pattern I can knit after two glasses of wine at dinner with my DD's boyfriend and his parents. Who are divorced. Oh, and his sister. Do not get me started. I ripped an entire sweater earlier today. Should have saved it for dessert! Don't worry about a sock binge. It's what keeps me sane. Or as sane as I'm gonna get...

10:08 PM  
Anonymous Elizabeth L in Apex, NC said...

I completely understand that list - something for everyone, but not enough to be done. I'm with Kozmic; euthanize that brown sock. (And I LOVE the give-to-my-kid plan, I am SO giving my seven-year old my sweater to rip). You should pick one to knit a mate to, just to confuse the rest of those loners!

8:15 AM  
Blogger Barbara Bretton said...

OMG, you're monsters! All of you! Euthanize my poor pretty brown sock just because it's a little . . . stretchy and hole-y? It took me so long to get that far with it, hours and hours of sloooow knitting time. (My hands aren't happy with 0s and 1s and skinny sock yarn. They've been known to rebel.) Do I have the guts, the intestinal fortitude to frog? I swear this is worse than dumping a chapter of a manuscript in progress!

12:57 PM  
Blogger Nancy Herkness said...

I think one of the reasons I can't deal with socks is the whole mate issue. I have such a low threshold of boredom that the thought of knitting another project EXACTLY THE SAME as the one I just knitted makes me shudder. I can't face that repetition. Once it's bound-off and blocked, I'm on to a new challenge (and I use the word "challenge" loosely since I gravitate toward the least challenging projects of all: scarves). I bow down to those of you who can knit two identical anythings!

6:40 PM  
Blogger Turtle said...

hey, i heard a term today that i thought you would get a kick out of..... a she-ro (vs hero)

10:59 PM  
Blogger Cindi Myers said...

Barbara, what size needles do you use to knit socks with the Wool-ease?

I usually like size 1s and sock yarn, but I have some Wool Ease in my stash and might try something with them.

I just started a new pair of socks today -- my first in a while. It felt so good to get back to them.

11:16 PM  
Blogger rho said...

a couple of things - first off - matching socks are highly over-rated -- and comfortable socks are the best (even if they may not be the prettiest)

second - you should do my friend Jane's sock Hedgerow - it is on Ravelry - I haven't done it yet but everyone who has loves loves loves the pattern and it does turn out fantastic.

I'm still the top down easy plain variety myself.... but this summer I want to master toe up - I have a heck of a time getting the feet long enough for some reason.

7:55 PM  
Blogger Elizabeth Delisi said...

I've been on a sock binge and so far, I don't like making socks. :-) Everyone seems to be making them and they seem like a fun, portable project. But I just couldn't bring myself to like making them.

First I tried making them on straight needles. This worked out quite well, until I realized I had to seam them up. I like sewing seams about as much as I like getting a root canal.

Then I tried, and gave up on, the dpns of regular length, as I felt like I was knitting with a porcupine. I never could seem to get comfortable with points sticking out everywhere, and always poking me.

Next, I tried knitting with tiny sock dpns and felt like I was knitting with a baby porcupine who made me drop all my stitches. (sigh)

Now I'm trying the magic loop method, and so far, I like it a lot better than the dpn methods. I could be onto something and might get in on the sock mania after all.

I know there's a two-circular-needle method, which I may try someday. At least it's good to know there are many methods to fill a sock craving!

5:14 PM  
Blogger rho said...

Magic Loop is great and 2 circs is great - those are the methods I do .... summer of socks on the way for me soon.

8:46 PM  

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